Gwen Stefani says birth of third son was first of several ‘miracles’ after battling ‘so much insecurity’

Gwen Stefani is getting real about her motherhood journey. 

In an interview with Nylon Magazine, the “Hollaback Girl” crooner opened up about her battle with insecurities after giving birth to her first two sons back-to-back, how her postpartum struggles impacted her career, and why the birth of her third son was “the start of [a series] of miracles” to come. 

“Things change when you have two babies,” said Stafani, who welcomed son Kingston in 2006 and son Zuma in 2008 with ex-husband Gavin Rossdale. “There was nothing left in me. I had no ideas. I had so much insecurity. I felt like – ‘Help!’”

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At the time, No Doubt had just wrapped up their “Sweet Escape” tour and were spending hours in the studio working on their next album, “Push and Shove.” The idea of balancing work and motherhood weighed heavily on the Grammy Award winner. 

“I would be leaving my family. And if I didn’t come home with a song, I’d be like, ‘Oh my God, I’m such a loser — I didn’t have dinner with my family, and I didn’t write a song. I wasted an entire day of my life trying to be in No Doubt again,’” she recalled. 

“I look at it now and think, ‘God, what was I doing trying to please everybody?’ Because really, I should have just been with my family. But we did it, and there are some good songs. … Don’t remind me. I don’t want to talk about it.”

In 2014, Stefani gave birth to her third son, Apollo. 

“I went from a difficult time in my life to giving birth to Apollo,” she said. “Getting pregnant with him was really the start of [a series] of miracles. It was almost like a restart to my life — the second chapter.”

No Doubt, who will be performing together for the first time in nearly a decade at Coachella this year, called it quits in 2015. One year later, Stefani and Rossdale got divorced, and the “Don’t Speak” singer began dating fellow “Voice” coach Blake Shelton. 

“Most things have surprised me in life,” she told Nylon. “One of the things I’ve learned is to be present in the moment and try to absorb what’s happening around me instead of looking ahead.”

Since their nuptials, the duo, who tied the knot in 2021, have been at the center of split rumors. 

“When you’re in love and have truly aligned values, nobody can get to us,” she said. “You can say whatever you want to say about our relationship — I mean, a week ago we were getting divorced again or something. It’s just lies. The truth is the truth, and we know what that is. And so that [negativity] would never penetrate just by me being vulnerable and sharing a song that I didn’t write for anybody else but myself and Blake.”

At the end of the day, Stefani said she’s learning how to balance work and home life but always finds herself leaning on the thing that’s been most constant in her life: music. 

“I told this to Blake the other day: ‘You don’t understand — to be a mom and a wife and then write a record?’ Everybody might be like, ‘Why did it take so long?’ Well, OK, I want to see you try to find five seconds to get creative. It’s so hard to squeeze it into the life that I have. And that’s why I think it’s more special than ever. It’s like when someone says, ‘Oh my God, I got to get my hair colored’ or ‘I got to take a bath today’ after just having a baby. That’s what it’s like for me to do music. It’s that selfish — and special,” she said.


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